Sickly sick

I am sick now, very sick... My brain is floating, eyes are sore, bones are cracking, muscles are aching, feeling cold yet thermometer told otherwise, stomach kicking hard, toilet being my very best friend...

Who can I blame other than myself?

Somehow, everything just happened within the same week. I was out almost every single day having good food, 'good' food that poisoned. There were the Beijing Duck Old Kingdom, Balinese Warung Agus, Japanese J cafe +++ *Considering three consecutive days of Yum Cha... I feel like puking now... Brain is spinning in the sky~ Weewwww~*

I need a break now. I need something light... very light but good...

Oh ya~ Happy Birthday Winnie~~ *Weeeewwww~~~ I am flying~~~~*

Never Give Up!

Yesterday, I was on the phone with Anne, getting some feedbacks on one of my gazillions cover letter. Somehow, the grumpy cat started to nag and nag on his hurdles on job hunting. *Can't help it sometimes...* My dear friend was really patience with my frustrations and had been a fantastic listener, listening to my problems. Every now and then, whispered some words of wisdoms, shared some of her and her friends' experiences.

One of them sticks to my mind, "Never give up!"

It hit me! Knowing bits and pieces of what she went through in the past, somehow, I felt more settle. I guess at that point, she became inspirational and revitalise my restless soul.

At that moment, I started to reflect. Frankly speaking, I had only been on the hunt for 6 weeks and considered what Louisa said on one fine day, "Average time needed for a graduate to get a job in Australia is at least 3 to 6 months." What am I complaining? Plus, I am not yet a graduate. Other than slapping myself for complicated my own situation myself, no others I could blame.

Later, aunt called from Malaysia. She gave me some comfort and encouragements. The feeling of unproductive was inflicting me badly then. By the end of the day, things that don't kill you will just make you stronger. No choice, but to take it easy now. *crossed fingers*

Thanks Anne and aunt. Much appreciated and well kept in heart *smile*

Oven baked Salmon.

I was reading this article yesterday and I couldn't stop laughing... It brought back some memories...

There was this day, in the middle of the night, happily I was and I decided to make some exotic dish, oven baked salmon with mango salad dressing. *Yummmmm~ It is great mannnn~*

I got fish seasoned on the foil, left it in the oven, turned up the heat at 200 celcius degrees for 20 minutes... *1 minute passed... 2 minutes passed... 3 minutes passed... ... ... 20 minutes passed... RIINNGGGGG!!!!!!*

As soon as I opened the oven... *Beeep BBBEEEEPPP BBEEEPPPp...!!!!!!!* Holy cow! The freaking fire detector alarmed! I quickly closed the oven, opened the balcony door, pulled a chair, grabbed a table cloth and started fanning towarded the fire detector. *All I had in my mind was the amount of $$$$ I had to coffer out if the ambulance and fire brigade came* Some miserable 5 minutes later, it stopped. For one moment, I was feeling lucky.

So, I went back to my Salmon. As soon as I opened the oven, the drama started all over again... When the alarm went off this time, I stood in front of my oven, hands on my stomach, swallowing my hunger and I didn't dare to open the oven.

There was my oven baked salmon with mango salad dressing, only difference was that the fish was already in charcoal form. *Geeeezzzz...*

Revisiting Manchester Lane

My last visit to Manchester Lane was couple of years ago and I had never thought of coming back here since then. Not to say that it was bad, but just there were better place. Since Dizzy's is off the map now, I guess will be nice to visit old Manchester. So when Ling's eldest sis came during the weekend, we went for some music and drinks.

The bouncer was nice that night and he gave us free entries. *smile* *save us $$$~* Dear Manchester Lane, hasn't changed as much. Nice atmosphere, no cigarette buds, nice cocktails, nice mocktails, nice music and ya~ nice accompany. While, the gals got me free drinks, what else could I ask for? *Ermmm... While... I could ask for $1 million worth Ang Pao~ Hehehe~* Too bad I was a bit shy to dance on floor... *Alright, you Europeans will start giggle and give me the roll-eye look... Who cares~*

Nice meeting ya, Lie~ Catch ya in Singapore~

Virginia Tech Massacre

In one day, 30+ people died...

The next day, President Bush, "Blar... blar... blar..."

The following day, Gun Laws is still loose as before and is getting thinner.

When will the bugging high flies start to think straight and perfer to make love instead of more war and violent?

Rest peace soul... May the scars and wounds fade one day... one day...

Invicible Wings

Sitting on the car, on my way back to the 'suburb' home, I found myself repeatedly replaying the song, The Invicible Wings by Angela Zhang (隱形的翅膀, 張韶涵). Again and again... sang to the lyrics...

隱形的翅膀
每一次 都在徘徊孤單中堅強
每一次 就算很受傷也不閃淚光 我知道 我一直有雙隱形的翅膀 帶我飛 飛過絕望
不去想 他們擁有美麗的太陽 我看見 每天的夕陽 也會有變化 我知道 我一直有雙隱形的翅膀 帶我飛 給我希望
我終於看到 所有夢想都開花 追逐的年輕 歌聲多嘹亮
我終於翺翔 用心凝望不害怕 哪裏會有風 就飛多遠吧
隱形的翅膀 讓夢恒久比天長 留一個願望 讓自己想像

The Invisible Wings *English translation from Wikipedia*
Each time, I become stronger in loneliness.
Each time, I hold off my tears even when I’m hurt deeply.
I know I have a pair of invisible wings that will let me fly.
Fly over despair.
I will not envy that they have the beautiful sun.
I can see that the dusk is different everyday.
I know I have a pair of invisible wings that will let me fly.
Give me hope.
I finally see all my dreams come true.
The youthful pursuits. How the singing voice resonant?
I finally take flight. I look forward and am not afraid.
I would fly however far the wind takes me.
Invisible wings let dreams last forever.
I’ll keep one wish for my own imagination.

Like me and those who is walking on a path with only glimpse of light, will find a way... I hope... *smile*

Like a breeze

Two weeks ago, in the middle of the night, mum called, "Xien, your dad and I are coming to Melbourne. So, meet us at the airport..." By the end of the conversation, I was still recovering for the sudden news. Then 3 days later, yap, there they were at the arrival hall.

To certain extend my parents visited us at a weird time, *While I knows is Easter... but they don't celebrate that in Malaysia...* I was not in a fantastic mood, *While not to say that I have been in a fantastic mood since fox rejected me... Still trying hard to make myself understand something just never meant to be... I still love ya fox...* simply just not the right time and many times, I had tried to make ways to get out from the suburb house. Although I controlled myself, I was away for few days, not with them, catching some fresh air. Emotionally complicated basket ---> me *Argggghhhh... Having so much freaking time, feeling damn unproductive, damn it...*

So the 10 days, my dismantle brain and heart swang with my distorted emotions.

Now, my parents are back in Malaysia. Thinking of it... I do appreciate my parents for dropping by. I am inflicted by their positivism and I love my mum big clear laugh~ Thanks for the support and patience.

*Shake his head* Why does my brain tend to complicate things and can't it be simpler...

Like a breeze, a breeze that revitalise my loss soul... they come and go when it is needed the most... ...

Sex to job

I was having my sip of vanilla ice cream and chocolate milk, under the fine blue sky. Then, a question popped out of nowhere and I almost spilled the milk. *Giggled*

Kenny said, "How can you ever be good in sex, if you never ever practice? On one side, the gals expect you to0 be good. On another side, they expect you to be a fresher..." ...

*Hmmm... Not so sure about the being fresh part...* What should I say... That kinda reminds me of my current situation. Not in the sex sense, but work sense. Looking forward to graduating soon, I cannot help feeling reluctant and a bit uneasy. After all, graduate = jobless.

Browsing through the Singapore job search website, I hardly found any suitable and stuck in dilemma. 90% of the Uni fresh graduate position required at least 3 years of working experience. *Sigh* I cannot help to wonder, isn't that a fresh graduate is one with no experience? When I say experience, I am referring to actual field experience. Or am I the only who thinks that way? Also, the advertisements remind me that the world does not need as much Master as I thought...

Then, I switch focus to Australia and find myself in a worse position. There isn't much job in my industry. I was desperate to a stage where I submitted application for HR Recruitment Consultant. *Lol* While I guess, I just need to be more patience and when the time is right, I will be there. *smile*